The Week 7 Picks

My motto to describe last week: "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell."

In other words, don’t ask me why the Eagles couldn’t get off the field on third down in the fourth quarter. Don’t ask me what got into TOFU and his three touchdowns. Don’t ask me why I can’t catch a break with my Fantasy Football team.

And for the love of God, don’t ask me what happened to the Cardinals on Monday night. I’ve watched a lot of football in my life, and I can’t recall a game where the winning team’s quarterback turned the football over six times and had a QB rating of 10.7. No way the Bears should have won that game. The best by-product of that game was Dennis Green’s press conference, which may have been the best outburst since Jim Mora’s "Playoffs?" rant.

But you can ask me why Rams coach Scott Linehan is crying about the NFL’s ten-second run-off rule on penalties. In case you missed it, the Seahawks got flagged for what Linehan thought was a false start with four seconds to go in the game with the Rams up 28-27. Turns out the Seahawks were called for an illegal formation, which does not include the run-off. Seattle’s Kris Brown nails a 54-yard field goal and the ‘Hawks win 30-28. Linehan said that the NFL needs to change the rule. Why? BECAUSE HE LOST! If the shoe was on the other foot, you think Linehan would be complaining about that rule?

If I sound a little bitter about last week, you’re right. I won’t tell you it’s because the Birds lost, the Cowgirls won, and I went 7-6 and 6-7. Just don’t ask me about it.

Sunday, October 22nd, 2006

The Match-up: San Diego (-5.0) @ Kansas City
The Skinny: So much for that improved Kansas City defense. When last we saw them, the Chiefs were busy giving up 45 points to the struggling Steelers. You know who’s not struggling? The Chargers, who just got through routing the Niners behind LaDanian Tomlinson. Did I mention Kansas City’s defense is allowing 129 yards per game on the ground?
Straight Up: San Diego
Against the Spread: San Diego

The Match-up: Green Bay (+5.0) @ Miami
The Skinny: Brett Favre vs. Joey Harrington? Advantage Favre. Miami’s defense vs. Green Bay’s defense? Advantage Miami. Two wins combined for these teams? Advantage nobody.
Straight Up: Miami
Against the Spread: Green Bay

The Match-up: Detroit (+3.5) @ New York Jets
The Skinny: The Jets held off a furious rally from the Dolphins last week (no, seriously) and improved to 3-3. Probably no such rally coming from the Lions.
Straight Up: New York Jets
Against the Spread: New York Jets

The Match-up: Pittsburgh (-2.5) @ Atlanta
The Skinny: The Steelers got back on track a week ago, and the Falcons took one on the chin at the hands of the New York Giants. The Steelers run defense should be able to contain Ron Mexico, meaning he’ll have to throw the ball for the Falcons to have a chance.
Straight Up: Pittsburgh
Against the Spread: Pittsburgh

The Match-up: Philadelphia (-5.0) @ Tampa Bay
The Skinny: The Eagles need a big rebound, especially on defense, after failing to show up in last week’s fourth quarter. The 1-4 Bucs and Bruce Gradkowski should oblige.
Straight Up: Philadelphia
Against the Spread: Philadelphia

The Match-up: New England (-5.5) @ Buffalo
The Skinny: Funny how nobody is talking about the Patriots when discussing the league’s elite. They’re certainly a quiet 4-1. Make that 5-1.
Straight Up: New England
Against the Spread: New England

The Match-up: Jacksonville (-9.5) @ Houston
The Skinny: While I do like the Jaguars to win, I’m not so sure the Texans won’t give them a game. From a greed perspective, I’m hoping for big things from Maurice Jones-Drew, Reggie Williams, and Josh Scobey.
Straight Up: Jacksonville
Against the Spread: Houston

The Match-up: Carolina (+3.0) @ Cincinnati
The Skinny: There’s a reason the odds makers are smarter than me. Carolina has won four straight since Steve Smith returned to the line up, and the Bengals don’t have a corner that can stay on the field with him. I know the game is in Cincinnati, but I don’t think Paul Brown Stadium is that big an advantage.
Straight Up: Carolina
Against the Spread: Carolina

The Match-up: Denver (-4.5) @ Cleveland
The Skinny: The only team in the league with fewer points scored than the Broncos? Oakland. And while the Broncos don’t give up a whole lot, they also don’t seem to blow teams out. Even teams like Cleveland.
Straight Up: Denver
Against the Spread: Cleveland

The Match-up: Arizona (-3.0) @ Oakland
The Skinny: I almost, almost, almost took the Raiders to win their first game of the year. That’s how devastating I think the Cardinals choke job could be. I just couldn’t bring myself to pick the Raiders. But don’t be surprised…
Straight Up: Arizona
Against the Spread: Arizona

The Match-up: Minnesota (+6.5) @ Seattle
The Skinny: Last week’s win in St. Louis is proof that the Seahawks can win without Shaun Alexander. They’ll have to do it again this week, as Alexander is still out.
Straight Up: Seattle
Against the Spread: Seattle

The Match-up: Washington (+9.0) @ Indianapolis
The Skinny: Let’s see. The Colts can’t stop the run, and that’s what Clinton Portis and Washington do best. Looks like Peyton Manning will need some more fourth quarter heroics to keep the Colts undefeated.
Straight Up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Washington

Monday, October 23rd, 2006

The Match-up: New York Giants (+3.5) @ Dallas
The Skinny: From the self-promotion department, I told you a week ago the Giants were better than their record. Another tough test for the G-Men in the Toilet.
Straight Up: New York Giants
Against the Spread: New York Giants

Bye Week: Baltimore, Chicago, Kansas City, New Orleans, San Francisco, St. Louis