I’ve got to get something off my chest.
I was watching last week’s Eagles-Chargers game on CBS, a broadcast featuring the color commentary of Dan Dierdorf. After scoring a touchdown, Eagles WR Terrell Owens caught a touchdown, draped a towel over his arm, held the football up like a cocktail waitress carrying a tray of drinks and paraded around the end zone. By all accounts, it was not the best TD celebration of his career. So after San Diego’s Keenan McCardell caught a touchdown, he did the exact same thing, in essence mocking T.O. Dierdorf said that Owens got what was coming to him, or something like that.
Which got me thinking…
Remember last year when the Eagles hosted the Ravens on Halloween? T.O. scored a touchdown and did Ray Lewis’ dance, and all the announcers could talk about was how Owens was mocking Lewis, disrespecting him as a man. If memory serves me correctly, CBS’ color commentator for that game was…Dan Dierdorf!
So, what is the difference between what T.O. did a year ago and what McCardell did last week?
For that matter, other national media members talked about Owens mocking Lewis, but then didn’t say a thing the following week when Pittsburgh’s Hines Ward did T.O.’s wing flap (not once, but twice) after scoring touchdowns against the Eagles, nor did anyone think it was disrespectful when multiple members of the Patriots (specifically Mike Vrabel and Rodney Harrison) did the same in the Super Bowl.
The message? Guys like T.O. get a bad rap no matter what they do. Makes it understandable when Owens does some of the things he does. The Media will not change their perception of Owens, so he’s basically giving them a collective middle finger.
And I don’t have a problem with that.
I do have a problem with my 4-9-1 record in Week 7 (overall 53-46-3), and will attempt to correct that this week. Straight up, we’re putting up numbers (9-5 last week, 67-35 overall), and the beat goes on.
The Match-up: Washington (+2.5) @ New York Giants
The Skinny: Nice last-second win for the Giants over Denver a week ago. The rival Washington Redskins provide the first NFC East test for the Giants.
Straight up: New York Giants
Against the Spread: New York Giants
The Match-up: Green Bay (+9.0) @ Cincinnati
The Skinny: Talk about going from bad to worse. The Packers are 1-5, and now Ahman Green is out for the season with a ruptured thigh tendon. Two words, Packers fans – Reggie Bush.
Straight up: Cincinnati
Against the Spread: Cincinnati
The Match-up: Arizona (+9.0) @ Dallas
The Skinny: Josh McCown and Larry Fitzgerald pull off the upset of the year.
Straight up: Arizona
Against the Spread: Arizona
The Match-up: Minnesota (+7.5) @ Carolina
The Skinny: As long as Jake Delhomme is fully recovered from the Lindros he sustained two weeks ago, I love the Panthers.
Straight up: Carolina
Against the Spread: Carolina
The Match-up: Cleveland (+2.0) @ Houston
The Skinny: The Texans are favored? Could they finally score their elusive first win of the season?
Straight up: Houston
Against the Spread: Houston
The Match-up: Chicago (+3.0) @ Detroit
The Skinny: The winner between these two 3-3 clubs will finish 7-9, win the NFC North and make the playoffs while two teams in the NFC East will be over .500 and on the outside looking in. Even the San Diego Padres think that’s outrageous.
Straight up: Detroit
Against the Spread: Detroit
The Match-up: Oakland (-1.0) @ Tennessee
The Skinny: Randy Moss played last week and scored a touchdown. Not bad for a guy that was doubtful with bruised ribs, eh?
Straight up: Oakland
Against the Spread: Oakland
The Match-up: Jacksonville (-3.0) @ St. Louis
The Skinny: I know he won last week, but I’m still not betting on Jamie Martin. Between the Jaguars stout defense and the depleted Rams secondary, I’ll take the Jags.
Straight up: Jacksonville
Against the Spread: Jacksonville
The Match-up: Kansas City (+6.0) @ San Diego
The Skinny: How quickly can the Chargers rebound from last week’s heartbreaker? I’d say by the 4th quarter. I can see San Diego coming from behind to win a close game late.
Straight up: San Diego
Against the Spread: Kansas City
The Match-up: Miami (+2.5) @ New Orleans
The Skinny: It’s about time for some breaks to go in favor of the Saints. A couple of weeks ago, they were flagged for holding on a missed field goal, giving Atlanta another shot (which they, of course, made). Then there was last week’s fumble that wasn’t but was returned for a touchdown. The breaks always seem to even themselves out.
Straight up: New Orleans
Against the Spread: New Orleans
The Match-up: Tampa Bay (-11.0) @ San Francisco
The Skinny: I’m probably the only guy in the business that changed his pick when he saw Ken Dorsey was going to start for the Niners on Sunday. Dorsey may be able to keep San Francisco close.
Straight up: Tampa Bay
Against the Spread: San Francisco
The Match-up: Philadelphia (+3.5) @ Denver
The Skinny: The Eagles defense will need to replicate their run-stopping effort against the Broncos this week and put the game in the hands of Jake Plummer, who eventually will remember that he is Jake Plummer and start chucking interceptions again.
Straight up: Philadelphia
Against the Spread: Philadelphia
The Match-up: Buffalo (+9.0) @ New England
The Skinny: I guess you really shouldn’t feel sorry for the two-time defending World Champions, but the Patriots have lost their air of invincibility. Not saying they’ll lose to Buffalo, especially at home, but the Bills could give them a scare.
Straight up: New England
Against the Spread: Buffalo
The Match-up: Baltimore (+10.0) @ Pittsburgh
The Skinny: Speaking of underachieving, I give you the Baltimore Ravens. How do you beat that defense? Run right at them. What is the Steelers’ offensive strength? Running the football. Uh-oh.
Straight up: Pittsburgh
Against the Spread: Pittsburgh
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Thursday, October 20, 2005
The Week 7 Picks
“Clutch.”
To some, it’s a car part. To the sports fan, it’s a word used to describe a play that occurs at a key time in the game, one that often changes momentum and has a direct impact on the final score. “Clutch” can also describe the player who makes such a play. On Saturday, October 15th, 2005, the term “clutch” was personified by a freshman kicker at the University of Massachusetts named Armando Cuko.
In Saturday’s game against James Madison (ranked fourth nationally in Division I-AA), Cuko kicked a 41 yard field goal with eight seconds to go lifting the Minutemen to a 10-7 win on homecoming weekend. Now, making that kick for a freshman is pressure enough. What makes Cuko’s kick so special is that the game was being played in a virtual monsoon, on a sloppy field where the mud was ankle deep in spots. Most kickers wouldn’t be able to get their footing, let alone drill the kick the way Cuko did.
Hell, even Kirk Gibson thinks Armando Cuko is clutch.
Speaking of clutch, this guy scored his best week of the season, posting 11-3 marks both straight up and against the spread. Now, I’m not saying I’m clutch like Armando Cuko (because quite frankly no one is), but I am superstitious. That said, this week’s picks will be brief in nature as last week’s were, in hopes of replicating the results.
But before I share the picks, big props to the boys who made last weekend’s road trip such a blast:
W “Laying on the Hood of the Trans Am” Jackson
The Archbishop Desmond “Dez” Jackson (Go home and go to sleep, I ain’t tryin’ to holla at you, I’m tryin’ to holla at some bitches)
My brother, Otis “I peed in the alley” Miller
And yours truly, Jake “Sideline boy at Tiki Bob’s” Miller
And to the Penn State fan from the hood, take your head out of the oven (at least long enough to read the picks). Acknowledgement is the first step.
If you have to ask, you’re probably better off not knowing…
The Match-up: Kansas City (+1.5) @ Miami
The Skinny: This game was moved to Friday due to the impending threat of Hurricane Wilma. The Dolphins may wish the game was cancelled altogether.
Straight up: Kansas City
Against the Spread: Kansas City
The Match-up: New Orleans (+3.0) @ St. Louis
The Skinny: The Saints expect to have Joe Horn back in the lineup, while the Rams will be without Marc Bulger for at least three weeks. I’m not saying Jamie Martin is Tommy Maddox, but he’s also not a guy I’d wager on.
Straight up: New Orleans
Against the Spread: New Orleans
The Match-up: Green Bay (-2.0) @ Minnesota
The Skinny: Rare is Brett Favre favored in a dome. How bad must the Vikings be?
Straight up: Green Bay
Against the Spread: Green Bay
The Match-up: San Diego (+4.0) @ Philadelphia
The Skinny: The Eagles could use a big win to silence their critics following their embarrassing loss in Dallas prior to the bye. A win over AFC power San Diego would suffice.
Straight up: Philadelphia
Against the Spread: Philadelphia
The Match-up: San Francisco (+12.5) @ Washington
The Skinny: The trade of Tim Rattay to Tampa ensures that the 49ers will go with Alex Smith for the remainder of the season. My condolences, Niners fans.
Straight up: Washington
Against the Spread: San Francisco
The Match-up: Pittsburgh (+1.0) @ Cincinnati
The Skinny: Only because I’m not sure how healthy Ben Roethlisberger is.
Straight up: Cincinnati
Against the Spread: Cincinnati
The Match-up: Indianapolis (-16.0) @ Houston
The Skinny: The league’s last undefeated team rolls into Houston, where their fast, aggressive defense should give the Texans’ O-line fits. Perhaps David Carr could save himself some punishment by simply laying down in the pocket.
Straight up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Houston
The Match-up: Detroit (+3.0) @ Cleveland
The Skinny: Since Steve Mariucci has yet to name his starting QB, this is a tough game to pick. My guess is Joey Harrington gets one more week (Translation – take the Browns).
Straight up: Cleveland
Against the Spread: Cleveland
The Match-up: Dallas (+3.0) @ Seattle
The Skinny: Dallas sucks.
Straight up: Seattle
Against the Spread: Seattle
The Match-up: Buffalo (+3.0) @ Oakland
The Skinny: The Raiders may be without Randy Moss, which may or may not be a good thing.
Straight up: Buffalo
Against the Spread: Buffalo
The Match-up: Denver (+2.0) @ New York Giants
The Skinny: Denver has won five straight and sits atop the AFC West. And yet, they’re a road dog against the Giants. Do the math.
Straight up: New York Giants
Against the Spread: New York Giants
The Match-up: Tennessee (+3.5) @ Arizona
The Skinny: If only Dennis Green would have gone with Josh McCown all season. He did this same crap last year (you undoubtedly remember the one and only start of the John Navarre era). Hey Denny, let the kid play!
Straight up: Arizona
Against the Spread: Arizona
The Match-up: Baltimore (+1.0) @ Chicago
The Skinny: Thomas Jones sure looked healthy last week for a guy who was listed as “Doubtful” when I picked them to lose to the Vikings. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on the Bears PR staff.
Straight up: Chicago
Against the Spread: Chicago
The Match-up: New York Jets (+7.0) @ Atlanta
The Skinny: Vinny Testaverde is merely keeping the seat warm for Philip Rivers, who may make his way to New York prior to Tuesday’s trade deadline.
Straight up: Atlanta
Against the Spread: Atlanta
To some, it’s a car part. To the sports fan, it’s a word used to describe a play that occurs at a key time in the game, one that often changes momentum and has a direct impact on the final score. “Clutch” can also describe the player who makes such a play. On Saturday, October 15th, 2005, the term “clutch” was personified by a freshman kicker at the University of Massachusetts named Armando Cuko.
In Saturday’s game against James Madison (ranked fourth nationally in Division I-AA), Cuko kicked a 41 yard field goal with eight seconds to go lifting the Minutemen to a 10-7 win on homecoming weekend. Now, making that kick for a freshman is pressure enough. What makes Cuko’s kick so special is that the game was being played in a virtual monsoon, on a sloppy field where the mud was ankle deep in spots. Most kickers wouldn’t be able to get their footing, let alone drill the kick the way Cuko did.
Hell, even Kirk Gibson thinks Armando Cuko is clutch.
Speaking of clutch, this guy scored his best week of the season, posting 11-3 marks both straight up and against the spread. Now, I’m not saying I’m clutch like Armando Cuko (because quite frankly no one is), but I am superstitious. That said, this week’s picks will be brief in nature as last week’s were, in hopes of replicating the results.
But before I share the picks, big props to the boys who made last weekend’s road trip such a blast:
W “Laying on the Hood of the Trans Am” Jackson
The Archbishop Desmond “Dez” Jackson (Go home and go to sleep, I ain’t tryin’ to holla at you, I’m tryin’ to holla at some bitches)
My brother, Otis “I peed in the alley” Miller
And yours truly, Jake “Sideline boy at Tiki Bob’s” Miller
And to the Penn State fan from the hood, take your head out of the oven (at least long enough to read the picks). Acknowledgement is the first step.
If you have to ask, you’re probably better off not knowing…
The Match-up: Kansas City (+1.5) @ Miami
The Skinny: This game was moved to Friday due to the impending threat of Hurricane Wilma. The Dolphins may wish the game was cancelled altogether.
Straight up: Kansas City
Against the Spread: Kansas City
The Match-up: New Orleans (+3.0) @ St. Louis
The Skinny: The Saints expect to have Joe Horn back in the lineup, while the Rams will be without Marc Bulger for at least three weeks. I’m not saying Jamie Martin is Tommy Maddox, but he’s also not a guy I’d wager on.
Straight up: New Orleans
Against the Spread: New Orleans
The Match-up: Green Bay (-2.0) @ Minnesota
The Skinny: Rare is Brett Favre favored in a dome. How bad must the Vikings be?
Straight up: Green Bay
Against the Spread: Green Bay
The Match-up: San Diego (+4.0) @ Philadelphia
The Skinny: The Eagles could use a big win to silence their critics following their embarrassing loss in Dallas prior to the bye. A win over AFC power San Diego would suffice.
Straight up: Philadelphia
Against the Spread: Philadelphia
The Match-up: San Francisco (+12.5) @ Washington
The Skinny: The trade of Tim Rattay to Tampa ensures that the 49ers will go with Alex Smith for the remainder of the season. My condolences, Niners fans.
Straight up: Washington
Against the Spread: San Francisco
The Match-up: Pittsburgh (+1.0) @ Cincinnati
The Skinny: Only because I’m not sure how healthy Ben Roethlisberger is.
Straight up: Cincinnati
Against the Spread: Cincinnati
The Match-up: Indianapolis (-16.0) @ Houston
The Skinny: The league’s last undefeated team rolls into Houston, where their fast, aggressive defense should give the Texans’ O-line fits. Perhaps David Carr could save himself some punishment by simply laying down in the pocket.
Straight up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Houston
The Match-up: Detroit (+3.0) @ Cleveland
The Skinny: Since Steve Mariucci has yet to name his starting QB, this is a tough game to pick. My guess is Joey Harrington gets one more week (Translation – take the Browns).
Straight up: Cleveland
Against the Spread: Cleveland
The Match-up: Dallas (+3.0) @ Seattle
The Skinny: Dallas sucks.
Straight up: Seattle
Against the Spread: Seattle
The Match-up: Buffalo (+3.0) @ Oakland
The Skinny: The Raiders may be without Randy Moss, which may or may not be a good thing.
Straight up: Buffalo
Against the Spread: Buffalo
The Match-up: Denver (+2.0) @ New York Giants
The Skinny: Denver has won five straight and sits atop the AFC West. And yet, they’re a road dog against the Giants. Do the math.
Straight up: New York Giants
Against the Spread: New York Giants
The Match-up: Tennessee (+3.5) @ Arizona
The Skinny: If only Dennis Green would have gone with Josh McCown all season. He did this same crap last year (you undoubtedly remember the one and only start of the John Navarre era). Hey Denny, let the kid play!
Straight up: Arizona
Against the Spread: Arizona
The Match-up: Baltimore (+1.0) @ Chicago
The Skinny: Thomas Jones sure looked healthy last week for a guy who was listed as “Doubtful” when I picked them to lose to the Vikings. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on the Bears PR staff.
Straight up: Chicago
Against the Spread: Chicago
The Match-up: New York Jets (+7.0) @ Atlanta
The Skinny: Vinny Testaverde is merely keeping the seat warm for Philip Rivers, who may make his way to New York prior to Tuesday’s trade deadline.
Straight up: Atlanta
Against the Spread: Atlanta
Thursday, October 13, 2005
The Week 6 Picks
Before we get to this week’s picks, I have to comment on last week’s Eagles-Cowboys game, and in the interest of censoring myself, I shall replace all of the inappropriate terminology with the word “chicken:”
What the chicken kind of chicken game was that? How do the Eagles go down to chicken Dallas and lose to those chicken chickens? Drew chicken Bledsoe throws for three chicken TD’s? Terry chicken Glenn burns us twice (even though she’s pretty chicken fast)? Chicken. Chicken chicken. That chicken stadium is such a hole. The hole with a chicken hole in the chicken roof. And its filled with chickens. And if I have to see Jerry chicken Jones and that stupid chicken commercial, I’m going to strangle his chicken chicken so hard his chicken plastic surgery will fall of his chicken face. Chicken chicken chicken. Chicken chicken chicken chicken chicken. Mother chickens.
As for the double-digit winning streak? It’s over, thanks to last week’s 8-6 mark (chicken). A push in the Jacksonville/Cincinnati game (thanks to a late move in the line) kept me over .500 on the books for the week.
Apologies for the brevity of these picks, but it’s a road game for The Kid this weekend. Here they are.
The Match-up: Jacksonville (+3.0) @ Pittsburgh
The Skinny: Exhale, Steelers fans – Ben Roethlisberger didn’t tear anything in his knee when it was hyper-extended on Monday night. As for this game, it was a tough call without knowing the status of Roethlisberger’s knee. I mean, if Ben can’t go, the Steelers are left with Charlie Batch at QB, and that’s not good for anyone involved.
Straight up: Jacksonville
Against the Spread: Jacksonville
The Match-up: Minnesota (+3.0) @ Chicago
The Skinny: I know the Vikings have struggled this season and have their problems playing outdoors, but are they really dogs against the Bears without Thomas Jones?
Straight up: Minnesota
Against the Spread: Minnesota
The Match-up: Miami (+5.5) @ Tampa Bay
The Skinny: Watch for Ricky Williams to make his return to action. But the real story is college teammates Ronnie Brown and Carnell Williams facing each other for the first time.
Straight up: Tampa Bay
Against the Spread: Tampa Bay
The Match-up: New York Giants (+3.5) @ Dallas
The Skinny: Chicken Dallas chicken sucks. Chickens.
Straight up: New York Giants
Against the Spread: New York Giants
The Match-up: Cleveland (+5.5) @ Baltimore
The Skinny: You know, some games just don’t inspire anyone. Trent Dilfer vs. Anthony Wright…something tells me this one won’t be airing on ESPN Classic anytime soon.
Straight up: Baltimore
Against the Spread: Baltimore
The Match-up: Carolina (+1.0) @ Detroit
The Skinny: Seriously, the Lions are favored? What’s wrong with this picture?
Straight up: Carolina
Against the Spread: Carolina
The Match-up: Cincinnati (-3.0) @ Tennessee
The Skinny: Still drinking the Bengals Kool Aid despite last week’s loss in Jacksonville.
Straight up: Cincinnati
Against the Spread: Cincinnati
The Match-up: Washington (+6.0) @ Kansas City
The Skinny: Toughest game of the weekend to pick. How will the Chiefs respond off the bye (and off a big collapse at home against the Eagles)? Will the Redskins defense contain Priest Holmes and the potent Kansas City offense? Stay tuned.
Straight up: Kansas City
Against the Spread: Kansas City
The Match-up: Atlanta (-5.5) @ New Orleans
The Skinny: Ron Mexico likely returns for the Dirty Birds, and Deuce McAllister is now done for the year after tearing his ACL last week. Not a good situation for the Saints.
Straight up: Atlanta
Against the Spread: Atlanta
The Match-up: New York Jets (+3.0) @ Buffalo
The Skinny: Kelly Holcomb gets another start at QB for the Bills, and he’ll face a stern challenge from the Jets defense. Memo to Holcomb – get the ball to Lee Evans.
Straight up: Buffalo
Against the Spread: Buffalo
The Match-up: New England (+3.0) @ Denver
The Skinny: The Denver Broncos have played very well of late, especially running the ball and on defense. What’s more, Jake Plummer has gone three straight games without an interception (all three Denver wins). That just means he’s overdue.
Straight up: New England
Against the Spread: New England
The Match-up: San Diego (-2.0) @ Oakland
The Skinny: Big bounce back week for the Bolts after falling to the Steelers at home on Monday. They’ll have a short week to get ready for the Raiders.
Straight up: San Diego
Against the Spread: San Diego
The Match-up: Houston (+9.5) @ Seattle
The Skinny: Even though Matt Hasselbeck has virtually no one to throw to, he still can hand it off to Shaun Alexander, and that alone should be enough to knock off Houston.
Straight up: Seattle
Against the Spread: Seattle
The Match-up: St. Louis (+13.5) @ Indianapolis
The Skinny: St. Louis is great on turf, just not Indianapolis’ turf. The Colts offense still isn’t untracked, and they’re still undefeated. Scary.
Straight up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Indianapolis
What the chicken kind of chicken game was that? How do the Eagles go down to chicken Dallas and lose to those chicken chickens? Drew chicken Bledsoe throws for three chicken TD’s? Terry chicken Glenn burns us twice (even though she’s pretty chicken fast)? Chicken. Chicken chicken. That chicken stadium is such a hole. The hole with a chicken hole in the chicken roof. And its filled with chickens. And if I have to see Jerry chicken Jones and that stupid chicken commercial, I’m going to strangle his chicken chicken so hard his chicken plastic surgery will fall of his chicken face. Chicken chicken chicken. Chicken chicken chicken chicken chicken. Mother chickens.
As for the double-digit winning streak? It’s over, thanks to last week’s 8-6 mark (chicken). A push in the Jacksonville/Cincinnati game (thanks to a late move in the line) kept me over .500 on the books for the week.
Apologies for the brevity of these picks, but it’s a road game for The Kid this weekend. Here they are.
The Match-up: Jacksonville (+3.0) @ Pittsburgh
The Skinny: Exhale, Steelers fans – Ben Roethlisberger didn’t tear anything in his knee when it was hyper-extended on Monday night. As for this game, it was a tough call without knowing the status of Roethlisberger’s knee. I mean, if Ben can’t go, the Steelers are left with Charlie Batch at QB, and that’s not good for anyone involved.
Straight up: Jacksonville
Against the Spread: Jacksonville
The Match-up: Minnesota (+3.0) @ Chicago
The Skinny: I know the Vikings have struggled this season and have their problems playing outdoors, but are they really dogs against the Bears without Thomas Jones?
Straight up: Minnesota
Against the Spread: Minnesota
The Match-up: Miami (+5.5) @ Tampa Bay
The Skinny: Watch for Ricky Williams to make his return to action. But the real story is college teammates Ronnie Brown and Carnell Williams facing each other for the first time.
Straight up: Tampa Bay
Against the Spread: Tampa Bay
The Match-up: New York Giants (+3.5) @ Dallas
The Skinny: Chicken Dallas chicken sucks. Chickens.
Straight up: New York Giants
Against the Spread: New York Giants
The Match-up: Cleveland (+5.5) @ Baltimore
The Skinny: You know, some games just don’t inspire anyone. Trent Dilfer vs. Anthony Wright…something tells me this one won’t be airing on ESPN Classic anytime soon.
Straight up: Baltimore
Against the Spread: Baltimore
The Match-up: Carolina (+1.0) @ Detroit
The Skinny: Seriously, the Lions are favored? What’s wrong with this picture?
Straight up: Carolina
Against the Spread: Carolina
The Match-up: Cincinnati (-3.0) @ Tennessee
The Skinny: Still drinking the Bengals Kool Aid despite last week’s loss in Jacksonville.
Straight up: Cincinnati
Against the Spread: Cincinnati
The Match-up: Washington (+6.0) @ Kansas City
The Skinny: Toughest game of the weekend to pick. How will the Chiefs respond off the bye (and off a big collapse at home against the Eagles)? Will the Redskins defense contain Priest Holmes and the potent Kansas City offense? Stay tuned.
Straight up: Kansas City
Against the Spread: Kansas City
The Match-up: Atlanta (-5.5) @ New Orleans
The Skinny: Ron Mexico likely returns for the Dirty Birds, and Deuce McAllister is now done for the year after tearing his ACL last week. Not a good situation for the Saints.
Straight up: Atlanta
Against the Spread: Atlanta
The Match-up: New York Jets (+3.0) @ Buffalo
The Skinny: Kelly Holcomb gets another start at QB for the Bills, and he’ll face a stern challenge from the Jets defense. Memo to Holcomb – get the ball to Lee Evans.
Straight up: Buffalo
Against the Spread: Buffalo
The Match-up: New England (+3.0) @ Denver
The Skinny: The Denver Broncos have played very well of late, especially running the ball and on defense. What’s more, Jake Plummer has gone three straight games without an interception (all three Denver wins). That just means he’s overdue.
Straight up: New England
Against the Spread: New England
The Match-up: San Diego (-2.0) @ Oakland
The Skinny: Big bounce back week for the Bolts after falling to the Steelers at home on Monday. They’ll have a short week to get ready for the Raiders.
Straight up: San Diego
Against the Spread: San Diego
The Match-up: Houston (+9.5) @ Seattle
The Skinny: Even though Matt Hasselbeck has virtually no one to throw to, he still can hand it off to Shaun Alexander, and that alone should be enough to knock off Houston.
Straight up: Seattle
Against the Spread: Seattle
The Match-up: St. Louis (+13.5) @ Indianapolis
The Skinny: St. Louis is great on turf, just not Indianapolis’ turf. The Colts offense still isn’t untracked, and they’re still undefeated. Scary.
Straight up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Indianapolis
Friday, October 07, 2005
The Week 5 Picks
Can you believe that Sunday marks Week 5 already? Its unreal how fast this season is going by. I guess we’re coming up on mid-season, and as coincidence would have it, The Kid is starting to round into mid-season form. Last week’s 10-4 record was my third consecutive 10+ win week, bringing the season record to 39-21 (only percentage points behind ESPN’s top guy, Sean Salisbury, sitting at 39-20). My 9-5 record against the spread was not only my best week of the year, but also got me back above .500 for the season. It’s usually around this time that I hang a 4-10, 3-11 week up there. You’ve been warned.
The Match-up: Baltimore (+1.5) @ Detroit
The Skinny: I know it seems like I rank on Joey Harrington every week, and I usually do. But I thought he showed some signs of life in almost leading the Lions to a road upset in Tampa a week ago. It’s a shame Harrington doesn’t play like that all the time. If he did, Lions fans wouldn’t be counting down the days until Jeff Garcia returns from his broken leg.
Straight up: Baltimore
Against the Spread: Baltimore
The Match-up: New Orleans (+3.0) @ Green Bay
The Skinny: The good news for the Green Bay Packers? Even at 0-4, they are not mathematically eliminated from the playoffs. That’s not to say I’d feel good about their chances, especially with that defense. But if the Packers are going to win 6-7 games this year (which might actually win the NFC North), they’ll need to start soon.
Straight up: Green Bay
Against the Spread: Green Bay
The Match-up: Seattle (+3.0) @ St. Louis
The Skinny: All kidding aside, the Seattle/St. Louis games of late have been good ones, and they always seem to have some impact on the division standings. Of course, with Arizona and San Francisco in the division, the Rams and Seahawks should be first and second (in some order). St. Louis draws first blood in this year’s round robin.
Straight up: St. Louis
Against the Spread: St. Louis
The Match-up: Tampa Bay (-3.5) @ New York Jets
The Skinny: Every now and again, you get a feeling in your gut about a particular game, even if common sense should tell you to feel otherwise. One of the major keys to Tampa’s early-season success has been the running of Carnell “Cadillac” Williams, but it’s highly unlikely that he’ll be able to go on Sunday. The Jets turn the reigns over to 86-year old Vinny Testaverde, a former Buccaneer, and normally that would scare me. But something is telling me that Vinny and the Jets will get it done.
Straight up: New York Jets
Against the Spread: New York Jets
The Match-up: New England (+3.0) @ Atlanta
The Skinny: Remember something I mentioned a couple of weeks back – the Patriots haven’t lost back-to-back games since Weeks 15 and 16 of the 2002 season. That is ridiculous. Against a one-dimensional Falcons offense (especially with Ron Mexico dinged), I like the Patriots to avoid their second consecutive loss.
Straight up: New England
Against the Spread: New England
The Match-up: Miami (+2.5) @ Buffalo
The Skinny: The Bills will turn to Kelly Holcomb in an attempt to jump-start their slumbering offense. Now, that’s not exactly Jim Sorgi subbing for Peyton Manning, but it probably isn’t the solution to Buffalo’s offensive problems either. The reality for the Bills is that they’ll only go as far as the legs of Willis McGahee will take them.
Straight up: Buffalo
Against the Spread: Buffalo
The Match-up: Chicago (+3.0) @ Cleveland
The Skinny: I was only half-kidding last week when I said the Bears would actually gain ground in their division while on bye last week, but that’s exactly what they did. The first place Bears return to action in Cleveland this week.
Straight up: Chicago
Against the Spread: Chicago
The Match-up: Tennessee (+3.0) @ Houston
The Skinny: In a word? Yawn. I guess somebody has to win, right? I actually liked the way Houston hung around with the mighty Bengals last week. I expect them to ride the legs of Domanick Davis to a ‘W’ this week.
Straight up: Houston
Against the Spread: Houston
The Match-up: Indianapolis (-14.0) @ San Francisco
The Skinny: Normally, a 14-point line would be cause for concern, until you realize it’s the potentially Super Bowl bound Colts taking on the 49ers. Can you imagine what the spread would be if the game was in Indianapolis? Alex Smith will make his first NFL start on Sunday, and if the Niners O-line doesn’t block Dwight Freeney, it may be Smith’s last start as well.
Straight up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Indianapolis
The Match-up: Washington (+7.0) @ Denver
The Skinny: Props to both the Redskins and Broncos on big wins last week. The ‘Skins gave up a late score, but eventually beat Seattle in OT to stay undefeated. Denver stepped into the low altitude and defensively frustrated the Jaguars. When two good defenses go head to head, you can bet the game will be tight. Clinton Portis returns to his old haunts, but it’s Denver who will get the last laugh in a tight one at Mile High.
Straight up: Denver
Against the Spread: Washington
The Match-up: Carolina (-3.0) @ Arizona
The Skinny: Anybody else get the feeling the Panthers were going to come from ahead to lose that game Monday against the Packers? They’ll have to play four full quarters to beat a Cardinals team that looks much, much better with Josh McCown under center in place of Kurt Warner.
Straight up: Carolina
Against the Spread: Carolina
The Match-up: Philadelphia (-3.5) @ Dallas
The Skinny: It’s like Christmas in October for me, as the Eagles head to that piece of crap stadium with the hole in the roof looking to win their fourth straight heading into the bye. Last year, the Birds hung 49 on Dallas on a Monday night (the infamous T.O./Nicolette Sheridan towel game). This year, the only towel involved should be the one Dallas throws in after the Eagles start running them off the field.
Straight up: Philadelphia
Against the Spread: Philadelphia
The Match-up: Cincinnati (+2.5) @ Jacksonville
The Skinny: The 4-0 Bengals (that still sounds funny, even though I’m drunk on the Cincinnati Bengals Kool Aid) take their show to Jacksonville, where the Jags will be looking to rebound from last week’s embarrassing loss to Denver. I’m a little skeptical of the line (4-0 Cincinnati a road dog?), thus I’m taking Jacksonville. Maybe the buzz is starting to wear off.
Straight up: Jacksonville
Against the Spread: Jacksonville
The Match-up: Pittsburgh (+3.0) @ San Diego
The Skinny: Courtesy of big wins over the New York Giants and New England Patriots (scoring a combined 86 points in the two victories), the Chargers have evened their record at 2-2 and now face their third straight playoff-caliber team, the Pittsburgh Steelers. The Steelers will still have a bad taste in their mouths, as Monday will be their first game action since being upset by the Pats. That said, the Chargers offense is hot. Maybe too hot for even Pittsburgh’s defense to contain.
Straight up: San Diego
Against the Spread: San Diego
The Match-up: Baltimore (+1.5) @ Detroit
The Skinny: I know it seems like I rank on Joey Harrington every week, and I usually do. But I thought he showed some signs of life in almost leading the Lions to a road upset in Tampa a week ago. It’s a shame Harrington doesn’t play like that all the time. If he did, Lions fans wouldn’t be counting down the days until Jeff Garcia returns from his broken leg.
Straight up: Baltimore
Against the Spread: Baltimore
The Match-up: New Orleans (+3.0) @ Green Bay
The Skinny: The good news for the Green Bay Packers? Even at 0-4, they are not mathematically eliminated from the playoffs. That’s not to say I’d feel good about their chances, especially with that defense. But if the Packers are going to win 6-7 games this year (which might actually win the NFC North), they’ll need to start soon.
Straight up: Green Bay
Against the Spread: Green Bay
The Match-up: Seattle (+3.0) @ St. Louis
The Skinny: All kidding aside, the Seattle/St. Louis games of late have been good ones, and they always seem to have some impact on the division standings. Of course, with Arizona and San Francisco in the division, the Rams and Seahawks should be first and second (in some order). St. Louis draws first blood in this year’s round robin.
Straight up: St. Louis
Against the Spread: St. Louis
The Match-up: Tampa Bay (-3.5) @ New York Jets
The Skinny: Every now and again, you get a feeling in your gut about a particular game, even if common sense should tell you to feel otherwise. One of the major keys to Tampa’s early-season success has been the running of Carnell “Cadillac” Williams, but it’s highly unlikely that he’ll be able to go on Sunday. The Jets turn the reigns over to 86-year old Vinny Testaverde, a former Buccaneer, and normally that would scare me. But something is telling me that Vinny and the Jets will get it done.
Straight up: New York Jets
Against the Spread: New York Jets
The Match-up: New England (+3.0) @ Atlanta
The Skinny: Remember something I mentioned a couple of weeks back – the Patriots haven’t lost back-to-back games since Weeks 15 and 16 of the 2002 season. That is ridiculous. Against a one-dimensional Falcons offense (especially with Ron Mexico dinged), I like the Patriots to avoid their second consecutive loss.
Straight up: New England
Against the Spread: New England
The Match-up: Miami (+2.5) @ Buffalo
The Skinny: The Bills will turn to Kelly Holcomb in an attempt to jump-start their slumbering offense. Now, that’s not exactly Jim Sorgi subbing for Peyton Manning, but it probably isn’t the solution to Buffalo’s offensive problems either. The reality for the Bills is that they’ll only go as far as the legs of Willis McGahee will take them.
Straight up: Buffalo
Against the Spread: Buffalo
The Match-up: Chicago (+3.0) @ Cleveland
The Skinny: I was only half-kidding last week when I said the Bears would actually gain ground in their division while on bye last week, but that’s exactly what they did. The first place Bears return to action in Cleveland this week.
Straight up: Chicago
Against the Spread: Chicago
The Match-up: Tennessee (+3.0) @ Houston
The Skinny: In a word? Yawn. I guess somebody has to win, right? I actually liked the way Houston hung around with the mighty Bengals last week. I expect them to ride the legs of Domanick Davis to a ‘W’ this week.
Straight up: Houston
Against the Spread: Houston
The Match-up: Indianapolis (-14.0) @ San Francisco
The Skinny: Normally, a 14-point line would be cause for concern, until you realize it’s the potentially Super Bowl bound Colts taking on the 49ers. Can you imagine what the spread would be if the game was in Indianapolis? Alex Smith will make his first NFL start on Sunday, and if the Niners O-line doesn’t block Dwight Freeney, it may be Smith’s last start as well.
Straight up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Indianapolis
The Match-up: Washington (+7.0) @ Denver
The Skinny: Props to both the Redskins and Broncos on big wins last week. The ‘Skins gave up a late score, but eventually beat Seattle in OT to stay undefeated. Denver stepped into the low altitude and defensively frustrated the Jaguars. When two good defenses go head to head, you can bet the game will be tight. Clinton Portis returns to his old haunts, but it’s Denver who will get the last laugh in a tight one at Mile High.
Straight up: Denver
Against the Spread: Washington
The Match-up: Carolina (-3.0) @ Arizona
The Skinny: Anybody else get the feeling the Panthers were going to come from ahead to lose that game Monday against the Packers? They’ll have to play four full quarters to beat a Cardinals team that looks much, much better with Josh McCown under center in place of Kurt Warner.
Straight up: Carolina
Against the Spread: Carolina
The Match-up: Philadelphia (-3.5) @ Dallas
The Skinny: It’s like Christmas in October for me, as the Eagles head to that piece of crap stadium with the hole in the roof looking to win their fourth straight heading into the bye. Last year, the Birds hung 49 on Dallas on a Monday night (the infamous T.O./Nicolette Sheridan towel game). This year, the only towel involved should be the one Dallas throws in after the Eagles start running them off the field.
Straight up: Philadelphia
Against the Spread: Philadelphia
The Match-up: Cincinnati (+2.5) @ Jacksonville
The Skinny: The 4-0 Bengals (that still sounds funny, even though I’m drunk on the Cincinnati Bengals Kool Aid) take their show to Jacksonville, where the Jags will be looking to rebound from last week’s embarrassing loss to Denver. I’m a little skeptical of the line (4-0 Cincinnati a road dog?), thus I’m taking Jacksonville. Maybe the buzz is starting to wear off.
Straight up: Jacksonville
Against the Spread: Jacksonville
The Match-up: Pittsburgh (+3.0) @ San Diego
The Skinny: Courtesy of big wins over the New York Giants and New England Patriots (scoring a combined 86 points in the two victories), the Chargers have evened their record at 2-2 and now face their third straight playoff-caliber team, the Pittsburgh Steelers. The Steelers will still have a bad taste in their mouths, as Monday will be their first game action since being upset by the Pats. That said, the Chargers offense is hot. Maybe too hot for even Pittsburgh’s defense to contain.
Straight up: San Diego
Against the Spread: San Diego
Saturday, October 01, 2005
The Week 4 Picks
Ever been to Vegas? In case you haven’t, it’s a pretty cool place. There are big, tall resort hotels and casinos covered in bright lights, and they’re always building more of them. It truly is an oasis in the middle of the desert. And how can they afford to keep doing this? Because of suckers like me, that’s how. As proven in the past, anyone can pick winners (and I nailed 10 of them last week, bringing my season’s record to 29-17). But those guys that set the lines do so for a reason – to make money. That’s why more often than not a 10-4 straight-up record is accompanied by a 5-9 mark against the spread.
Bye weeks this week for Chicago, Cleveland, Miami and Pittsburgh. No bye week for this guy. That said, here are the Week 4 picks.
The Match-up: Detroit (+6.5) @ Tampa Bay
The Skinny: The scorecard so far on Joey Harrington's "make or break" year? Break. After squeaking by the Packers in Week 1, the Lions looked like, well, the Lions against Chicago the week before the bye. A road trip to red-hot Tampa is imminent.
Straight up: Tampa Bay
Against the Spread: Tampa Bay
The Match-up: Seattle (+2.0) @ Washington
The Skinny: The bye week may have come at a bad time for Washington. Will the Redskins be able to rediscover the momentum they gained during the last 3:46 of the Dallas game on Monday night of Week 2? They’ll have a good chance against a Seattle team that has been abysmal on the road. But I think the ‘Skins are more of the team we saw for the first 56:14 of the Dallas game as opposed to the guys who completed the miracle comeback.
Straight up: Seattle
Against the Spread: Seattle
The Match-up: Houston (+9.5) @ Cincinnati
The Skinny: What in the name of Jack Thompson, “The Throwin’ Samoan,” is going on with the Bengals? I’m not sure if they’re as good as they look or if they’re playing against inferior teams, but the Bengals look great so far. I hope there’s still room on the Bengals bandwagon, because I’m about to climb aboard.
Straight up: Cincinnati
Against the Spread: Cincinnati
The Match-up: Denver (+4.0) @ Jacksonville
The Skinny: Jacksonville may possess the modern-day version of the ‘No Name’ defense. Their not loaded with superstars, but they play an aggressive style predicated on pressuring the quarterback and forcing turnovers. Against a guy prone to the interception like Jake Plummer, the Jags are always a solid play.
Straight up: Jacksonville
Against the Spread: Jacksonville
The Match-up: Indianapolis (-7.0) @ Tennessee
The Skinny: Seriously, Peyton Manning is still playing for the Colts, right? If you would have told me that Manning would have two TD tosses through three games, I would have guessed the Colts would be 0-3 or 1-2. But they’re 3-0 and have allowed a total of 16 points on the season. If you do that, I could be your quarterback and you’d be 3-0.
Straight up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Indianapolis
The Match-up: San Diego (+5.5) @ New England
The Skinny: There's been much said about the Patriots' ability to lose a player to injury or free agency and simply plug in an able body and continue on without missing a beat. But the loss of Rodney Harrison will be extremely hard to cope with, especially against a good running team like San Diego.
Straight up: New England
Against the Spread: San Diego
The Match-up: Buffalo (pick) @ New Orleans
The Skinny: You might as well call the Saints Willie Nelson, because they’re on the road again. This is their third game in less than three weeks. Two of the three were home games but all three will take place in three different stadiums. Figure that out. Much like the Week 1 win over Carolina where emotion carried the Saints, such will be the case in San Antonio on Sunday (especially against a Buffalo defense suddenly minus Takeo Spikes).
Straight up: New Orleans
Against the Spread: New Orleans
The Match-up: St. Louis (+3.0) @ New York Giants
The Skinny: Someone forgot to tell the Giants that they had to play two halves in San Diego last Sunday. After hanging around with the Bolts through the first 30 minutes, the Giants got bum rushed in the second and ended up losing by 22. At lease Eli survived the rabid San Diego crowd.
Straight up: New York Giants
Against the Spread: New York Giants
The Match-up: New York Jets (+7.0) @ Baltimore
The Skinny: Imagine the gambler’s delight upon reading the following sentence as it scrolled along ESPN’s Bottom line: ‘Jets QB Brooks Bollinger expected to start Sunday at Baltimore.’ Brooks, meet Ray Lewis.
Straight up: Baltimore
Against the Spread: Baltimore
The Match-up: Minnesota (+6.0) @ Atlanta
The Skinny: Sad to say that courtesy of last week's win, the 1-2 Vikings are now tied with the Chicago Bears for 2nd place in the NFC North (trailing 1-1 Detroit by mere percentage points). Luckily, if the Vikings fall to 1-3 in Atlanta on Sunday, they're probably still going to be in 2nd place. Can you sense the sarcasm?
Straight up: Atlanta
Against the Spread: Atlanta
The Match-up: Philadelphia (+2.0) @ Kansas City
The Skinny: To be perfectly honest, the line on this game scares me a little bit. It’s not often that the Eagles are underdogs, but they are this week. So does that mean I'm going to break one of my golden rules? Never.
Straight up: Philadelphia
Against the Spread: Philadelphia
The Match-up: Dallas (+3.0) @ Oakland
The Skinny: As referenced above, I will never break one of my golden rules, therefore I'm taking the 0-3 (but much better than their record indicates) Raiders to finally break into the win column.
Straight up: Oakland
Against the Spread: Oakland
The Match-up: San Francisco (+2.5) @ Arizona
The Skinny: What a Sunday night barn-burner: 1-2 San Francisco at 0-3 Arizona. I'm sure national TV audiences will be clamoring for this one. Remember everyone saying Arizona was going to win the West? I think some guy pointed out at the beginning of the year that they weren't going to be that good…
Straight up: San Francisco
Against the Spread: San Francisco
The Match-up: Green Bay (+7.5) @ Carolina
The Skinny: An old adage applies here, and its one I’ve committed to memory because I’ve been burned by it in the past – Never bet against Brett Favre on a Monday night.
Straight up: Carolina
Against the Spread: Green Bay
Bye weeks this week for Chicago, Cleveland, Miami and Pittsburgh. No bye week for this guy. That said, here are the Week 4 picks.
The Match-up: Detroit (+6.5) @ Tampa Bay
The Skinny: The scorecard so far on Joey Harrington's "make or break" year? Break. After squeaking by the Packers in Week 1, the Lions looked like, well, the Lions against Chicago the week before the bye. A road trip to red-hot Tampa is imminent.
Straight up: Tampa Bay
Against the Spread: Tampa Bay
The Match-up: Seattle (+2.0) @ Washington
The Skinny: The bye week may have come at a bad time for Washington. Will the Redskins be able to rediscover the momentum they gained during the last 3:46 of the Dallas game on Monday night of Week 2? They’ll have a good chance against a Seattle team that has been abysmal on the road. But I think the ‘Skins are more of the team we saw for the first 56:14 of the Dallas game as opposed to the guys who completed the miracle comeback.
Straight up: Seattle
Against the Spread: Seattle
The Match-up: Houston (+9.5) @ Cincinnati
The Skinny: What in the name of Jack Thompson, “The Throwin’ Samoan,” is going on with the Bengals? I’m not sure if they’re as good as they look or if they’re playing against inferior teams, but the Bengals look great so far. I hope there’s still room on the Bengals bandwagon, because I’m about to climb aboard.
Straight up: Cincinnati
Against the Spread: Cincinnati
The Match-up: Denver (+4.0) @ Jacksonville
The Skinny: Jacksonville may possess the modern-day version of the ‘No Name’ defense. Their not loaded with superstars, but they play an aggressive style predicated on pressuring the quarterback and forcing turnovers. Against a guy prone to the interception like Jake Plummer, the Jags are always a solid play.
Straight up: Jacksonville
Against the Spread: Jacksonville
The Match-up: Indianapolis (-7.0) @ Tennessee
The Skinny: Seriously, Peyton Manning is still playing for the Colts, right? If you would have told me that Manning would have two TD tosses through three games, I would have guessed the Colts would be 0-3 or 1-2. But they’re 3-0 and have allowed a total of 16 points on the season. If you do that, I could be your quarterback and you’d be 3-0.
Straight up: Indianapolis
Against the Spread: Indianapolis
The Match-up: San Diego (+5.5) @ New England
The Skinny: There's been much said about the Patriots' ability to lose a player to injury or free agency and simply plug in an able body and continue on without missing a beat. But the loss of Rodney Harrison will be extremely hard to cope with, especially against a good running team like San Diego.
Straight up: New England
Against the Spread: San Diego
The Match-up: Buffalo (pick) @ New Orleans
The Skinny: You might as well call the Saints Willie Nelson, because they’re on the road again. This is their third game in less than three weeks. Two of the three were home games but all three will take place in three different stadiums. Figure that out. Much like the Week 1 win over Carolina where emotion carried the Saints, such will be the case in San Antonio on Sunday (especially against a Buffalo defense suddenly minus Takeo Spikes).
Straight up: New Orleans
Against the Spread: New Orleans
The Match-up: St. Louis (+3.0) @ New York Giants
The Skinny: Someone forgot to tell the Giants that they had to play two halves in San Diego last Sunday. After hanging around with the Bolts through the first 30 minutes, the Giants got bum rushed in the second and ended up losing by 22. At lease Eli survived the rabid San Diego crowd.
Straight up: New York Giants
Against the Spread: New York Giants
The Match-up: New York Jets (+7.0) @ Baltimore
The Skinny: Imagine the gambler’s delight upon reading the following sentence as it scrolled along ESPN’s Bottom line: ‘Jets QB Brooks Bollinger expected to start Sunday at Baltimore.’ Brooks, meet Ray Lewis.
Straight up: Baltimore
Against the Spread: Baltimore
The Match-up: Minnesota (+6.0) @ Atlanta
The Skinny: Sad to say that courtesy of last week's win, the 1-2 Vikings are now tied with the Chicago Bears for 2nd place in the NFC North (trailing 1-1 Detroit by mere percentage points). Luckily, if the Vikings fall to 1-3 in Atlanta on Sunday, they're probably still going to be in 2nd place. Can you sense the sarcasm?
Straight up: Atlanta
Against the Spread: Atlanta
The Match-up: Philadelphia (+2.0) @ Kansas City
The Skinny: To be perfectly honest, the line on this game scares me a little bit. It’s not often that the Eagles are underdogs, but they are this week. So does that mean I'm going to break one of my golden rules? Never.
Straight up: Philadelphia
Against the Spread: Philadelphia
The Match-up: Dallas (+3.0) @ Oakland
The Skinny: As referenced above, I will never break one of my golden rules, therefore I'm taking the 0-3 (but much better than their record indicates) Raiders to finally break into the win column.
Straight up: Oakland
Against the Spread: Oakland
The Match-up: San Francisco (+2.5) @ Arizona
The Skinny: What a Sunday night barn-burner: 1-2 San Francisco at 0-3 Arizona. I'm sure national TV audiences will be clamoring for this one. Remember everyone saying Arizona was going to win the West? I think some guy pointed out at the beginning of the year that they weren't going to be that good…
Straight up: San Francisco
Against the Spread: San Francisco
The Match-up: Green Bay (+7.5) @ Carolina
The Skinny: An old adage applies here, and its one I’ve committed to memory because I’ve been burned by it in the past – Never bet against Brett Favre on a Monday night.
Straight up: Carolina
Against the Spread: Green Bay
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